last post EVER (for 2008)

ok, so this jackass named chip saltsman from tennessee is running for the job of republican national committee chairman, which would basically make him in charge of the entire republican party and the spokesman for the entire party. so guess what? he is a complete racist. he distributed cds that he burned to every member of the republican national committee full of songs that he illegally pirated, including a racist one called “barack the magic negro” that is supposed to be funny. but actually it isn’t funny at all, even if you are a racist or a fan of racial humor, because the humor is just retarded. it isn’t the kind of racial humor you get from someone like dave chappelle, carlos mencia, or david alan grier, because that stuff is actually funny. then again, those guys all have (or in dave chappelle’s case had) plenty of talented comedy central comedy writers working on their shows, and the guy who wrote this song didn’t. this song, “barack the magic negro”, was popularized by rush limbaugh on his radio show (just one of many examples of rush limbaugh’s racism), and we all know rush limbaugh is very influential among the conservative base of the republican party and among republicans in the house of representatives. rush limbaugh claims not to be influential nowadays, but that is just because the republicans lost the elections and are very unpopular now, and he wants to avoid any of the blame for their crushing defeats in the 2006 and 2008 elections. we see his real influence when a top contender for leader of the republican party gets his music off rush’s show, and rush limbaugh was also the guy who kept promoting sarah palin as his favorite pick for vice presidential nominee, before john mccain chose her. rush limbaugh basically brought us sarah palin. he is also the guy who got president bush to withdraw the nomination of harriet miers to the supreme court. rush limbaugh got the house republicans to oppose the banking industry bailout the first time around, and he helped build pressure from the conservative base on senate republicans that led to them blocking the auto industry bailout (resulting in president bush giving the auto industry a bailout using money from the other bailout). he got the comprehensive immigration reform bill that was backed by john mccain, george w. bush, ted kennedy, and most other politicians in washington, d.c. to be defeated in the house, through his tirades against it on the radio. you see, the other conservative talk radio show hosts all take their cue from rush limbaugh, and they all read the same talking points, and they have millions of brainwashed followers willing to do whatever they say. he also coordinates with fox news, basically by having people at fox news listen to his show for talking points and by having his staff watch fox news for talking points. plenty of conservative websites like the drudge report, conservative blogs, conservative news sites, and conservative forum sites then spread the message on the internet. anyway, that successful model is what liberals/progressives have been trying to copy with our blogs, with air america radio, and with our gradual success in taking over msnbc, except most of us on the left have realized radio is a lost cause and have focused on taking over “teh internets”.

back to the original topic... this song does not even have an original tune, and is to the tune of “puff the magic dragon”. i would link to it on youtube, but the original music video of it was taken down (presumably for being offensive or something). well ok, here is another music video of it, but it starts out with obama talking so it isn’t just the song. since that is also on youtube, i expect it will also be taken down soon since youtube loves taking stuff down and censoring everything. well ok, so we could confine the problem to just chip saltsman, rush limbaugh, and the guy who made the song, paul shankman, as well as rush’s millions of listeners, and say that it is just an isolated incident and does not involve republicans as a whole. not so fast. politico.com reports that this controversy will probably HELP chip saltsman win the title of republican national committee chairman. that’s right: being a racist actually helps you become the leader of the republican party. instead of distancing themselves from chip saltsman and condemning him for distributing this song (and doing likewise to rush limbaugh and paul shanklin), republicans are all defending him and saying it is wrong to condemn him. oh really? the last time i checked, barack obama, a black man, actually won the election, and we americans were busily patting ourselves on the back over how racism had finally been completely destroyed, never to resurface again, with the help of a news media and politicians repeating that “post-racial” message. and now this comes up, proving that racism still does exist after all!

in related news about racism, gov. rod blagojevich of illinois has appointed roland burris to the u.s. senate, based on the fact that roland burris is black. roland burris is one of those people who runs for office again and again and keeps losing again and again, not the kind of guy who can actually win elections. sure, he managed to win 2 elections like back in the 70s and 80s, but who cares? he has been out of politics (at least the winning side of politics) for decades. former black panther and current congressman bobby rush said that we shouldn’t “hang or lynch” roland burris at a press conference held by gov. rod blagojevich, roland burris, and congressman bobby rush. bobby rush also said “my prayers have been answered ... that the governor would appoint an african-american to complete the term of president obama.” both rod blagojevich and bobby rush repeatedly emphasized that roland burris is black and therefore he should be the senator from illinois, and they made the argument that if you don’t let the only black man in the senate serve as a senator because of who appointed him, you are a racist who hates black people. so what is the problem here? a BIG one. rod blagojevich is the racist here, cynically thinking that if he names a black person to the senate, it is somehow legitimate, given that rod blagojevich has been indicted on federal corruption charges and is probably going to be impeached and removed from office soon. gov. blago thinks that if he names someone black, he can use the race card to make sure his pick gets seated in the senate. every single democratic senator currently in the senate has already come out against letting rod blagojevich appoint someone to the senate, and so has former senator and current president-elect barack obama. if anyone chooses the next senator from illinois, it should be either barack obama or the voters of illinois, not some corrupt crook like blago. this cynical maneuver of choosing a black man so that the appointment isn’t blocked is the most ridiculous use of the race card i have seen in some time, and it has no chance of working, given that barack obama has already condemned blago for appointing his replacement after trying to auction his senate seat off to the highest bidder. anyone dumb enough to appear at a press conference alongside rod blagojevich is committing political suicide, so i do not think roland burris will end up in the senate, although bobby rush can probably do anything and still get re-elected, since he is in such a safe district. anyway, my point is, yes, the republicans are a bunch of racist assholes, but not all racist assholes are in that party, and we have some too, like rod blagojevich. technically though, rod blagojevich might not exactly be racist, he might just be cynically trying to exploit the racism he perceives in others for his own political gain. but that is kind of the same thing anyway. just imagine if this appointment goes through, then in 2010 when roland burris is up for re-election to the united states senate, everyone will know that rod blagojevich (who by then will probably be a convicted felon in jail) was the guy who put him there. then roland burris will lose re-election (just like he has lost almost every election he has been in) and obama’s senate seat will fall into republican hands. that is what happens if we let blago pick the next senator and play the race card like this... we lose that senate seat to the republicans in 2 years. why do you think every single democratic senator came out against letting blago do that? i mean, duh! anyway, rod blagojevich must be stopped from being allowed to name roland burris (or anyone else) to the u.s. senate. he needs to be impeached and removed from office a.s.a.p. now i am not going to impugn roland burris’s honor or integrity at all; i am just saying this is not the kind of guy who knows how to win elections, and with blago’s kiss of death, his political career is over. here in new york state, governor david paterson is focused on appointing a successor to hillary clinton in the senate who can actually win elections. we have yet to find out if caroline kennedy is the one for the job, but her chances seem to have been waning a bit in recent days. caroline kennedy is still the top candidate, though. there aren’t many other potential senators who have statewide name recognition and can win elections, besides andrew cuomo. but andrew cuomo already has a job as state attorney general and he is still somewhat new there, so appointing him would cause problems by creating another vacancy to fill. plus we have more of that identity politics bullshit and people wanting a female senator to replace hillary clinton, the same identity politics bullshit that rod blagojevich is trying to exploit in illinois.

right now i am in florida on vacation, and i am glad to say i know very little about the politics of this state. the governor here might not be christ but he is crist, and i am pretty sure the republicans strongly control the entire state legislature here, plus i am in one of the most republican parts of the state, the place katherine harris was a congresswoman from, namely sarasota. florida is somewhat strange, a land of contradictions, a tropical paradise that elected and re-elected jeb bush as governor, the state with the most lightning, home to disney world and miami, a state that is completely flat and barely above sea level where the biggest industry is tourism. sarasota is mostly home to wealthy old people. further south than the rest of the states of the south, florida isn’t even one of them at all, as a former spanish colony conquered by then-general andrew jackson in violation of direct orders from the president at the time not to invade florida. people in florida generally do not have southern accents and the state does not really have the same southern culture as the actual states of the “south”. florida was not a major slave state, and has a whole lot of hispanics (mostly cubans in the miami area). so i would say the biggest contradiction about florida is that despite being the most southeastern state of all, it is not a part of the traditional south, but more like the bahamas or bermuda or hawaii or some other tropical paradise. most of the people in florida aren’t even from here, but, like me, are from places like new york state. however, i am actually going back to new york state soon, back where i have a job and the weather is horrible. i am really enjoying all the time relaxing here in florida and the great weather that is not even remotely wintery, and my trusted companion fluffems the dog is having the time of his life running around the backyard trying to catch all the lizards. anyway, this is the last blog post of mine EVER (for 2008). NEVER AGAIN will i ever publish a blog post in the year 2008. so do not worry about having to read thousands of blog posts in the next less-than-6-hours of 2008. of course, blogger/blogspot probably is in some wacko time zone like pacific instead of eastern, so it will likely show some weird time that makes no sense except to people on the west coast as the time i post this. perhaps the united states should follow the example of communist china and only have 1 time zone for the entire country, so that all clocks nationwide are synchronized. or even better, we could have one universal time coordinated for the entire planet, and call it UTC. and we could have things called “leap seconds” that we would add on at the end of the year so that everyone’s clocks would suddenly be one second off once 2009 starts. oh wait... i am receiving word that this proposal of mine has already been implemented. enjoy your leap second, everyone! it may be your last (if they decide afterwards to stop having leap seconds because they are a silly idea)! anyway, my parents are having me look at some things called “planets” in this thing called the “sky” now. i think the planets they are looking at are called “mars” and “venus”. that makes me wonder... WHERE IS EARTH?!? yes i know, earth is the planet you see if you look down, but how do we know aliens didn’t switch earth with some other planet last night when we were asleep? it would explain a lot of things, like why i am yawning right now, since my yawning most likely indicates my sleep was disturbed last night, and the simplest possible explanation would be earth being switched with another planet, according to occam’s razor, so therefore it must be true. with that in mind, it seems most likely that we are now on mars, and the planets in the sky that my parents want me to look at with them are really earth and venus. i wonder how the earth rovers spirit and opportunity are doing at exploring the barren wasteland that is earth. oh... i just yawned again... more proof of some kind of alien conspiracy... or maybe i am a part of the conspiracy but i forgot because of... i forget why i forgot, but i just yawned another time and feel quite tired now. it is strange how the sky is completely dark now, and it is not even 6:30 pm yet. anyway, it is time to put an end to this monstrous blog post once and for all. i yield myself such time as i may consume. i move that the blogosphere recess until 2009. all those in favor of the motion please rise. a sufficient number having arisen, the motion is adopted. i yield back the balance of my time. by order of the chair, the blogosphere is now in recess until 2009. *sound of gavel hitting against podium very loudly*